Cathedral that couple gave their time to gives back after woman's death

By Kelly Rayburn

STAFF WRITER

Article Launched: 10/21/2007 03:00:23 AM PDT

Peter Mantas struggled to describe his shock when he learned that his son, Andrew, was suspected of killing his ex-wife, Dimitra, with a baseball bat. "How can I even explain it?" he said. "I don't know if you've ever been in water and you're sinking and you're fighting for breath. That's what it was like, like I was drowning."

If there's one force responsible for pulling Mantas, along with his two daughters, from the water in the past year, it is the church community at the Ascension Greek Orthodox Cathedral in Oakland. The church, nestled in the Oakland hills, draws members from more than an hour away in the East Bay. Though people come from afar, parishioners describe a tight-knit community, ready to help whenever needed. When Dimitra died, it was church members who prepared meals, drove the girls from place to place and made funeral preparations. Mantas said that if he needed a favor, he didn't even need to pick up the phone. Someone was already offering to do it. "It was a godsend," he said.

The Mantas family joined the church after moving to Danville about five years ago. The Rev. Thomas Paris remembered that Peter and Dimitra became heavily involved right away. "They just hit the ground running," Paris said. Peter served on the parish council. Dimitra taught Sunday school and was president of the Ascension Parents Association and vice president of the church's Ladies Philoptochos Society. Philoptochos is a Greek word meaning "friend of the poor." "They were both involved," said Kleo Katsouras, a church member for nearly 10 years and a friend of Peter's. "They did more than the average person would do in the church -- both for the needy and the children." Paris said, "Both of them had a great work ethic. Whenever we had a meeting or anything like that, they were the last ones cleaning up."

The Mantas' two girls became involved in a Greek dance group at the church. Andrew was a different story. Paris remembered Andrew "had difficulty getting along with people." He was "very sullen" and "angry." He "acted like a bully." The Mantas family's problems were known by many people within the church as Peter and Dimitra went through a divorce. Dimitra spent hours upon hours as a church volunteer. "I don't want to play the psychologist," Paris said. "(But) maybe she was trying to get away from other problems."

Her faith was so strong that Dimitra brought Andrew to Paris just days before she was killed. "Andrew said he was hearing voices and believed he was demon-possessed," Paris said. Paris could do little. They said some prayers. Paris recommended immediate medical help. "We couldn't get close to him," he said.

After the killing, the incidents of support were too numerous to count, Peter said. "I didn't even have to ask (people) to do something," he said. "They knew what was needed and they would volunteer to do things."